Debra,  Dating

I’m not dating!

Just want to make one thing clear…

 

I am NOT on the Internet (including Facebook) to find a date!

Why?

Because I’m broken and I will fuck it up!

Imagine this:

You and I on an evening stroll and we get mugged. Yes, I have a pretty face, but don’t be mistaken. I will be the one breaking his arms and smashing his skull against the pavement. And I will probably not stop until he doesn’t move anymore. Blood doesn’t frighten me. Not the slightest. The enemy’s blood calms and encourages me. When I see him bleed I feel victorious and strong.

You will be the one standing five yards away pissing your pants. And I don’t blame you. I also wet my pants right before the first time I was shot.

It won’t matter how many they are. More muggers will just take a little longer and you will get even more wet.

That’s because I’m angry. My therapist says I will outperform a nuke any day – and he is right!

I never had a dad and my mom died when I was a kid. Meaningless killed by a drunk driver.

I lived and survived on the streets. Eight years old.

Alone.

I learned how to cheat and steal to survive. The mafia and a gun became my closest family. Murder, violence, and loss of friends regularly.
I’ve been at war and I should have been dead many times.
I have been driving in exploding vehicles and planes that got shot out of the sky.
I have found my self at both ends of a riffle and the other guy died.
I have seen innocent children getting sold, raped and killed.
I have seen women selling the last part of their body to get a fix.
I have been tortured and humiliated seven days in a row.

My friends died and I survived. Life isn’t fair. Not even close.
I can’t afford to love people because they die from me and I don’t trust people. No one!
I’m broken. So mad, angry and broken even the devil doesn’t want to date me.

And only I can heal me – and that will take a lot of time…

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